May 2, 2013

mania


This is an absolutely terrible "photograph" and I'm sorry but here we go.

This light is the only light in our house that stays on all night every night. It never gets a night off. Its bulb needs changing far more often than any other light in the house. It works twice as hard, and its only time to shine (heh) is at night when everyone is asleep and no one notices.

So it's 01:39 as I'm typing this and the only sounds are my fingers over the keys, the gentle hum of my laptop and the general sound of sleep in the house. I'm alone, but I'm not at all lonely. I have my thoughts, which are usually fine and I'm more than happy to be here on my own, thinking. That's fine, yeah yeah yeah. But these thoughts are not like yours. 

The only way I can describe this is like a car being chased down a huge motor way, speeding and dodging other cars on the road, narrowly avoiding crashing. These thoughts are great for creativity most of time, but awful for my sleeping pattern. I can't sleep when I'm like this, it's impossible to unwind and I also feel like I could be sleeping on the birth of some creative masterpiece - I don't want to miss out.

I have no idea what this post was. I feel like my eyes are going to fall out of my face and all I want to do right now is sleep but every time I close my eyes I see ideas and have to get back up to write them down or I think about them which leads to more thinking and more ideas and more writing. It's really horrible, I don't think I'd wish racing thoughts on my worst enemy. I just want to sleep, PLEASE.


No comments:

Post a Comment